Funko One Piece: Saint Jaygarcia Saturn's Beast Form?

Alright, let's get this straight. More One Piece Funko Pops are dropping. A freakin' Jumbo Saint Jaygarcia Saturn that's supposed to be a spider-man hybrid nightmare fuel, a Shanks "Pop Plus" which I guess means they finally decided to put some effort into the sculpt, and a Sabo. New One Piece Funko Pops Includes Saint Jaygarcia Saturn In His Beast Form - ComicBook.com

Plastic Crack Addiction

Look, I get it. Funko Pops are like plastic crack for some people. Gotta catch 'em all, right? But at what point does it become less about being a "collector" and more about being a corporate drone mindlessly buying whatever they shove in front of your face? This Saturn thing… a spider-man? Is that really what One Piece has become? A grotesque caricature designed to squeeze every last yen out of the fanbase?

And don't even get me started on the "Pop Plus." So, the regular Pops aren't good enough anymore? Now we gotta pay extra for details they should've included in the first place? Give me a break. What's next, "Pop Plus Plus" with actual moving parts and voice recordings?

I mean, I love One Piece, I really do. I’ve been following it since back when it was cool, before every other shonen was trying to rip off Oda’s style, but this just feels… lazy. It’s like they're banking on the Netflix series bringing in a whole new wave of unsuspecting victims– err, I mean, "fans" – who'll gobble up anything with a One Piece logo on it.

Speaking of which, Season 2 is coming March 10th, 2026. Eight episodes covering Loguetown to Drum Island. Chopper's gonna be there, offcourse. Which means more merch. More Funko Pops. More… everything.

The Netflix Effect

The Netflix series did bring in new fans. Okay, I'll give them that. But is that really a good thing if it just means more people lining up to buy this overpriced plastic garbage? Is that what Oda really wanted? For his epic tale of adventure and friendship to be reduced to… this?

Then again, maybe I'm just being a grumpy old man yelling at clouds. Maybe these new Funko Pops are awesome. Maybe the Saturn one will look amazing on a shelf next to my other… cough … "collectibles." Maybe I'll even pre-order that Shanks Pop Plus. Who am I kidding? I probably will.

Hot Topic dropped a One Piece collection last week, too. T-shirts and hoodies galore. It's a full-on assault on our wallets, people.

But hey, at least it ain't NFTs, right? Small mercies, I guess.

So, What's the Real Story?

It's a cash grab, plain and simple. They're preying on our nostalgia, our completionist tendencies, and our undying love for a series that deserves better than to be turned into a never-ending stream of cheaply-made plastic figurines. But hey, who am I to judge? I'll probably buy them anyway.